I'm so uncomfortable in my skin tonight.
It's been months and months since this visited.
I took the knife out, but he twisted it.
Grief looking over my shoulder
Wondering if I'm finished being happy yet.
Ready to take it back.
I want something present and sharp,
but i get the past, polluted and vague
I retreat instead
In my head
Fill my mind up with a life that isn't real
in the hopes that I won't remember what I was sad about
What I was scared about
What I can't fix
So impotent so broken so done with this
God, are you still in the centre of this like you said you were?
If I stay still in the centre of this will I know you are?
Just be my centre in the midst of this
It's your peace I miss.
It's possible with You that I will simply go to bed
Lie in safety
Till I wake
Not take back what isn't mine to mend
You can take it for tonight.
the end.
