2nd Session - The place of Psalms in silence

Rowland E. Prothero, writing over a hundred years ago, says:

"The Psalms are a mirror in which each man sees the motions of his own soul. They express in exquisite words the kinship which every thoughtful heart craves to find with a supreme, unchanging, loving God, who will be to him a protector, guardian, and friend. They utter the ordinary experiences, the familiar thoughts of men; but they give to these a width of range, an intensity, a depth, and an elevation, which transcend the capacity of the most gifted."



Last month we did our second session on Contemplative Prayer on the Psalms. I feel that we only scratched the surface, and it has led me to know that I want to spend much more time on this subject.

Bruce Bryant-Scott came out and explained a number of historical aspects regarding the psalms. I am not going to try and encapsulate that for you as I would not do any of it justice.  Suffice it to say that as someone who enjoys the history of the church and the history of the bible (as they are so intrinsically connected), I was fascinated and would like to have heard more.

What was beautiful was getting to hear him chant (in various forms) the psalms out loud in such a lovely setting.  It makes you remember that the Word of God should be something you take your time with, something that you linger over and roll around on your tongue like a fine wine.

The main gist of the session, from my perspective anyway, was to try and talk about the opportunity to embrace the psalms as a very concrete and human way to lay a foundation for both silent prayer and time with God in His word. It can be daunting to expect to find yourself so perfectly and completely alone with God in silence, and not all that healthy emotionally, because time in silent prayer can be far too ethereal if you do not connect it to something substantial. It has to have a cornerstone, a base point, an underpinning to keep you both connected vertically to God and horizontally to man and, most importantly in my opinion, to allow you to be aware of the emotions you are dealing with in this broken world so that you can rise above them in the end and find out what it is that God is saying to you about your place in that world.

I love the Psalms.  I have been blessed by them more times than I can count.  When I have found myself in pain, emotionally, spiritually, physically, I have been able to go to them like a friend, like a confidant, like a guide and be comforted by the non-judgmental quality of the human voice uttered likewise, often, in pain or distress.  It has given me the sense that I am not alone in the messy unreligious experience I may be having as I struggle, humanly, to find my feet again in my walk and overcome some area of conflict.

At the end of the session I read one of the psalms that I have been writing as a practice of finding my way out of a bad day, bad mood, bad inner battle, et cetera, in the tradition of the psalms as we know them.  As Bruce laid out for us, there are several different narrative styles used in the Psalms: first person, third person, God speaking to us, us speaking to God, either-or...

I don't pretend to know much about that, but what I do know is that there is something inherently healing and solid about writing out your emotions and your inner dialogue; so just pick one that feels comfortable to you. I think that God honours the attempt no matter how perfect/imperfect the final draft.  I encourage you to write your own psalm as a way to get at the truth of what you are feeling.  I hope to write more/speak more about this at another time so if there is not enough meat here, either ask me a particular question in the comments, or make it clear that you would like to explore this theme more going forward.

Here is the psalm I wrote again for reference:

Psalm 1013
I'm so uncomfortable in my skin tonight.
It's been months and months since this visited.
Grief looking over my shoulder; looking at me from the mirror
Wondering if I'm finished being happy yet.
Ready to take it back.

I want something present and sharp but i get the past, polluted and vague and scary.
I retreat instead
In my head
Fill my mind up with a life that isn't real in the hopes that I won't remember what I was sad about
What I was nervous about
What I can't fix
So impotent so broken so done with this

God, are you still in the centre of this like you said you were?
If I am still in the centre of this will I know you are?
Just be my centre in the midst of this
It's your peace I miss.

It's possible with you that I will simply go to bed
Lie in safety
Till I wake
Not take back what isn't mine to mend
You can take it for tonight.

the end.

So give it a try!  It may be fruitful for you. At least I pray it might.

God bless.

Contemplative prayer 101 -background, history and Lectio Devina

"these are the things God has revealed to us by his Spirit. The Spirit searches all things, even the deep things of God" — 1 Corinthians 2:9-10.     

The first session in the series was back on September 28th. It touched on the background and history of Contemplative prayer (To save you the trouble of googling click here!) along with the basic precepts of it. We also talked about some of the key players in its history and its current state.

I myself was first introduced to the idea of contemplative prayer as a structured part of a daily devotional practice sometime in 1996, and in the spring of that year I attended my first silent retreat led by Cynthia Bourgeault. (Check her out here) I encourage you to search for her presentations on Youtube (This is a fairly recent video) and/or read any of her books on the subject.  She is delightful and wise.

I was able to attend several of her weekend  retreats in the years that she spent in this area, as well as two led by her own mentor, Father Bruno Barnhart. Bruno is a Camaldolese-Benedictine monk of New Camaldoli Hermitage in Big Sur, California. He is the author of many books including The Good Wine: Reading John from the Center. (for a full list go here) It was from listening to him that I saw a very concrete fruit from time spent in silence with God; he speaks in the most articulate fashion I have ever heard. It is something to do with the time he spends not thinking and then using the time he is with people to just be a conduit of the words that are given to him, without all of his stuff in the way.  Would that I could.

What Cynthia, and the movement she is central to, (as the founder of the Contemplative Society - ( this is their website)) talk about is "Centering Prayer." It is what was first called Contemplative Prayer or Silent prayer, and I am of the opinion that it does not matter what you call it, it is that you make the attempt to do it. My favourite poetic name for it is Practising the Presence of God.  Another book I will recommend is called just that, and the author's name is Brother Lawrence. (Awesome book!) It is a collection of letters he wrote to a young monk who wondered at this man's ability to find peace and satisfaction in the most tedious of tasks.

There were two primary factors that led to the desire to do this series at this time.  About two years ago, I started watching the growing epidemic of addiction to electronic devices with ever-increasing unease. Even in my own life and the lives of my nearest and dearest they fill every waking hour until the ability to hear your own thoughts, never mind what God has to say to you, is almost impossible.
As I dwelt in thought on this growing phenomenon, I wondered what the antidote would be. At the same time I was also curious about the ever increasing western fascination with Eastern traditions such as Buddhism, Zen philosophy, and yogic practices.  Every magazine you open, even the health portion of the nightly news, is full of articles proclaiming the many benefits to be found meditating and doing yoga.  It is extremely hip to be a Buddhist.  Not so much to be a contemplative Christian. Why that might be is for another time, suffice it to say that the concept of Western Christianity seems very out of touch with our current modern culture, and in the marketplace of self-help, ready-made peace and inner wellness, Eastern traditions are easily trumping anything that can be found in the mainstream Christian church.

I was fairly young when I was first drawn to the idea of silence as it relates to prayer.  It might be a very ancient path in the church, but in my late 20s I found it to be very intriguing.  Here was this time-honoured tradition that was accessible to me. Like being told you could go back in time and then bring something home with you and make it fit into your modern world.  It is a true reflection for me of the expression, "God - the same yesterday, today and tomorrow."  It was comforting to me to know that I was entering a stream of Christian tradition that has remained essentially unchanged yet flexible from approximately the 6th century.  It may seem a contradiction in terms to look back at the past in order to embrace something that I am saying can be fresh and new, but as a dear friend said, “Sometimes reflecting on the past makes the future more clear and less frightening.  You don’t feel as alone.”  I feel that way when I know that the pioneers of this tradition were real people just living real lives and that what they taught wasn’t just a passing trend.
It was St. Benedict of Nursia (480 to 543)(more about him here) that first established the practice of Lectio Devina,(more fully explained here) which is important to know something about because it is this practice that contains the tradition of Contemplative Prayer as we know it today.  St. Benedict is considered the founder of western monasticism, but it was Guigo II,(info on him here) a Carthusian monk,who died late in the 12th century that formalised the four-step process of Lectio Devina in a book called The Ladder of  Monks.
In Guigo's four stages one first reads, which leads to think about (i.e. meditate on) the significance of the text; that process in turn leads the person to respond in prayer as the third stage. The fourth stage is when the prayer, in turn, points to the gift of quiet stillness in the presence of God, called contemplation.
Guigo named the four steps of this "ladder" of prayer with the Latin terms lectio, meditatio, oratio, and contemplatio.
Nowadays in most monastic houses you won't find that any one monk does these steps in a linear fashion, but they are there for a reason.  They are all aids to getting to the heart of time with God, time in his centre with nothing in the way.  I find it helpful to go through each one of them as a way to quiet both the body and the mind to reach a time of silence gently and not be too overwhelmed by it. Put much more eloquently by John of the Cross:

"Seek in reading and you will find in meditation; knock in prayer and it will be opened to you in contemplation" — The four stages of Lectio divina as taught by John of the Cross (1542 –1591).(click this!)

So for many centuries all of this wisdom and this very rich knowledge just stays put in monasteries and cloisters. It is out of reach of the laity and the everyday Christian. But around 1975, three Trappist monks begin a movement that brings this tradition out of the monastic houses and into the church proper. The most well known of the three is Thomas Keating (born 7th March 1923)(Brother Keating info), known as one of architects of Centering Prayer, (more about that here, in particular scroll down to the heading called "Practice" and you will see 4 point set of guidlines by Basil Pennington on the physical practice of it) a contemporary method of contemplative prayer, that emerged from St. Joseph's Abbey, Spencer, Massachusetts.

It is this new emergence and accessibility that brought people like Bruno Barnhart and Cynthia Bourgeault into prominence in this area, and into 2013 there are new authors appearing in the New Monastic movement which looks to cement even further this idea that we all have inherited this wisdom and it is not for keeping in stale, old monasteries, but in our churches (no matter what the denomination), in our homes, driving in a car, or wherever you find yourself in need of plugging in with God rather than your cell phone. I think that if you have found yourself drawn to some part of this, God probably has something specific to say to you about the relationship He wants to have with you and a devotional practice that can bear unexpected fruit for you.

It is apparent that each new generation finds something fresh and relevant in this ancient tradition, although the language might seem intimidating at first. We invite you to explore it with us next Saturday, October 26th when we will talk a little bit about how to get at some of the emotional, social, or cultural issues that keep us from being comfortable with silence, as well as exploring how the Psalms can act as a foundation on which to place what is sometimes an ethereal experience.

Dialogue, Debate and/or Discussion

The following post is from several years ago. But i had it stored in a different blog and wanted to move it here to be reminded of it:

I found out something I did not know today! I have always believed that I valued and appreciated discussion above debate. However, upon researching the difference today, I stumbled upon the reality for myself, which is, I do not really like either one.
The verbal dynamic that I have heretofore thought of as "discussion" is actually "dialogue". For the purposes of clarity and just to lay out the differences and convergences of all three, I have put an explanation I found most useful below. It  is from a site called "socratic seminars". It was just a point by point chart really, but very clear and, as it says, it is not a discussion as to whether there is a good or a bad way to go about this, there are just differences. Where the difficulty lays (and the trap for humans in relationship with each other to be careful about) is in knowing whether they are all participating in the same thing. I mean, it is no good to anyone if you think you are having a debate and someone in the same conversation thinks they are entering into dialogue or vice versa. Sometimes this runs along gender roles and sometimes it runs along philosophical ideologies. Anyway, have a look. Maybe you'll learn something too! I know I did. :)



Dialogue
Debate and/or Discussion

Dialogue is collaborative; cooperative; multiple sides work toward a shared understanding
Debate is competitive and/or oppositional; two (or more) opposing sides try to prove each other wrong; sometimes Discussion can move in this direction as well

In dialogue, one listens to understand, to make meaning, and to find common ground
In debate, (and sometimes discussion) one listens to find flaws, to spot differences, and to counter arguments

Dialogue enlarges and possibly changes a participant's point of view
Debate defends assumptions as truth; in discussions, participants may tend to "dig in"

Dialogue creates an open-mined attitude; an openness to being wrong and an openness to change
Debate creates an close-minded attitude, a determination to be right;

Discussion often tends to lead toward one "right" answer

In dialogue, one submits one's best thinking, expecting that other people's reflections will help improve it rather than threaten it
In debate, and often discussion, one submits one's best thinking and defends it against challenge to show that it is right

Dialogue calls for temporarily suspending of one's beliefs
Debate, and sometimes discussion, calls for investing wholeheartedly in one's beliefs

In dialogue, one searches for strengths in all positions
In debate, and sometimes discussion, one searches for weaknesses in the other positions

Dialogue respects all the other participants and seeks not to alienate or offend
Debate rebuts contrary positions and may belittle or deprecate other participants; a discussion gone awry may end up this way as well

Dialogue assumes that many people have pieces of answers and that cooperation can lead to a greater understanding
Debate assumes a single right answer that somebody already has

Dialogue remains open-ended
Debate demands a conclusion

Dialogue is mutual inquiry; collective knowledge
Discussion is individual opinions; individual knowledge

Dialogue practices a product
Debate and discussion produce products

Dialogue is divergent
Debate, and often discussion, is convergent


Note:
The differences between and among dialogue, discussion, and debate should not imply that dialogue is "good" and that discussion and debate are "bad." There are certainly times when discussion and debate are useful instructional strategies. The chart above is simply intended to articulate the differences.

Wells, Nevada

I fell asleep last night with a little girl resting in my arms.
She's a grown woman, but she's a little girl.

She may not have known she was in them, but in my mind's eye, I remembered what it was like, what it felt like to hold my own daughter across my lap in a rocking chair till she fell asleep and I just put us together in one, right there in Wells, Nevada.

She was right beside me
She was almost a thousand miles away and she was right beside me









I spent the night in Wells, Nevada, while falling asleep for snatched moments here on the Island.
I could smell the floors and felt the night around me, the silence getting bigger as it got later.
Knew what it looked like through the living room window into the dark, but I've never been there. Curled up beside her under the table she'd pulled her blanket and laptop beneath while we both tried to believe in the illusion of safety inside her makeshift fort.
Knew a stranger was breathing deeply in the other room, but didn't know if they were awake or not. The big man who rescued her from the side of the road.
Prayed short anxious one word prayers; Jesus, Jesus, Jesus.
Does she know I actually did keep the laptop open and on all night, my hand reaching out of its own volition to shift it back to the feed of her sleeping every time the screen went dark.

And I miss Wells, Nevada, because I was there, seriously, but I was so glad we got the fuck out.

I miss being there with that little girl, with that teenager, with that grown woman.

I miss hearing all of her words; spoken with that rich Kentucky-bred treacle.  Each and every one of them.  Some showed me a keyhole, some a window, some opened up a door real wide.

I like this girl.  I understand this girl.  I want to raise this girl all over again and take her to school, drop her off on the first day of school with a perfectly packed lunch bag full of love and sandwiches. 

I want to put a band-aid on her knees when she falls and gets them skinned, and I want to hear about her first love, and teach her how to drive a car so that when she grows up and gets a truck and drives across the country and gets stranded in Wells, Nevada, she remembers us laughing hysterically when she got it all wrong the first time.

I'd like to do it all in reverse until she gets what she needs, what she deserved to have.

I told her, "It's good to work out whether you want someone for something you need that you never got, or someone you need for something you never even knew you wanted", but the truth is she needed a good mother for pity's sake, a strong father so she can rest easy in who she is.

Wells, Nevada... never thought I'd be there, but I'll always be glad I was. Can't shake the feeling of the desert out of my heart right now and I don't think I'll try right away.